


Waiter, There's a Fly in my Coffee

by Erik_What_The_Fuck



Category: The Collector Series (Movies)
Genre: BUT there will be murder later for all you slobs, M/M, also this is so ooc, this is a coffee shop au, yes i know its for the collector
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-04
Updated: 2019-08-25
Packaged: 2020-04-07 13:49:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19086328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Erik_What_The_Fuck/pseuds/Erik_What_The_Fuck
Summary: Arkin has taken up a job as a barista in a local coffee shop, and he's grown rather fond of an eccentric regular customer.





	1. Chapter 1

It's a crisp, clear spring afternoon. Arikin is wiping down some tables at a local coffee shop, whistling as he does. It's a nice job, and he's able to help take care of himself and his ex wife and daughter. Sometimes he still needs to take on those old thieving jobs, but that's growing less and less common now. His life is getting better, and the sun is shining bright.  
The bell at the entrance rings, and Arkin looks up. A tall, attractive man strolls in, with closely cropped brown hair and black eyes that shine like onyx. Arkin can' help but blush some, but he fights it away and finishes wiping down the table.  
"Hello, sir!" He says, stepping behind the counter. "What would you like?"

    "Oh, just a black coffee." the man says in a hushed, careful voice that brings a soft blush to Arkin's ears. Arkin nods and takes the change, watching the man go to his seat.

    Arkin had always known he was attracted to men. Now that he was unmarried, he was able to explore that much more. Not that he would forget his ex wife and his daughter, it's just that...well, it was time to move on. And this man was just doing something to him. Maybe it was the cologne he was wearing, maybe it was his voice. But god, it was something. So when Arkin brings the coffee to this man, he may have just written down his number on the cup. He sets the cup down with a shaking hand and then darts back behind the counter, pretending to be fixed on cleaning a fixture. He can see the man through the glass of the pastry display, and oh god he's shaking so much. The man looks down at the cup and is about to take a sip when he sees the digits. He then turns, looking straight at Arkin who is trying but failing to hide behind some cake pops. The man stands and walks over, going to knock on the glass of the display. Arkin jumps up, blushing deeply and averting his gaze. The man can't help but smile.

    "My name is Richard." He says, looking down at the smaller man. "I would text you or call you sometime but.."

    Arkin's heart races. Oh god, he's probably straight isn't he? Fuck fuck, fuck fu-

    "I'd rather talk in person." Richard says. Arkin looks up. "What?"

    "I said, I'd rather talk to you in person. Don't want to miss out on seeing that handsome face. Come over to my table when you're on break" Richard turns and walks back to his seat, leaving Arkin a blushing mess


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Snksowieowj im so sorry it took me so long to update this. I’ve been...actually there’s no excuse. On another note is anyone else excited for the Collected?!?! Holy fuck!!!!!

A few minutes later Arkin’s shift is over. He changes out of his uniform into street clothes and walks back out to Richard. His palms are sweaty, and although he’s tried his best to look presentable he’s still a nervous mess. He smiles some at the man and grabs the chair across from him.  
“Mind if I sit?” Arkin asks.  
“Not at all,” Richard replies. He smiles back at the man, a thin smile that under different circumstances could be considered devious. Arkin sits and then just stays there. He’s suddenly realizing he’s not quite sure what to say or do. He’s certainly attracted to the strange man, but what is he supposed to do?  
Finally, Richard breaks the silence, ending the mutual awkwardness.  
“So, how is it working here?”  
Arkin shrugs. “It’s pretty good. Except fir being verbally abused by middle aged women who are angry we don’t have soy whipped cream.”  
Richard snorts.   
“Hm, sounds brutal. Honestly, if I had to deal with people making inane requests like that, I’d probably snap.”  
Arkin laughs.  
“Yeah, it’s honestly a wonder I haven’t yet. Anyways, what do you do?”  
“I work at the natural history museum curating the insect collection. It’s a good job, and I get to be alone most of the time.”  
“Ah, so you’re an introvert.”  
Richard shrugs. “I suppose I am.”  
There’s another lull in the conversation, and Arkin looks up at the television screen. An attractive middle aged woman is rattling off the details of yet another gristly series of murders. She’s dispassionate, seeming totally bored with the situation.  
“God, i hope they catch that psycho.” Arkin says.  
“Uh, yeah.” Richard says, sipping his coffee. “It’s pretty fucked up what they’ve done. But still, I’m impressed they’ve managed to evade capture this long.”  
Arkin raises an eyebrow. “Almost sounds like you admire the guy.”  
“I said I was impressed. Obviously he’s a terrible person and he’ll be caught eventually. Still, someone who can cover their tracks like that should be clever enough to be impressed by. If only in the most disgusted sense.”  
Arkin gives a slight nod.   
“Yeah, i guess so.” 

They pass a few hours in conversation. By the end, Arkin is totally enamored with the man. So when he offers to take him home, he almost can’t help but say yes.

They hold hands in the car. They’ve agreed not to take it farther than kissing for the night, both wanting to take it slow and really get to know each other. 

Richard’s house is like any other in the suburban neighborhood. It’s a two story building painted in a light grey. But once they’re inside, it’s clear the man has a rather...eccentric decorative taste. Instead of art, the walls are lined with insects in cases and anatomical posters that aren’t even framed. Curio cabinets are filled with preserved animal parts, and the man had to open the door to his own home in a very careful way as to not trigger a tripwire alarm system. The house is also a bit of a mess, but with antique books and more animal parts in bags. It looks like the bachelor pad of an individual who was eccentric at best, and twisted at worst.

It makes Arkin almost reconsider the man.

Richard seems to notice this and turns back to Arkin. “Sorry about the mess...and the decor. I wasn’t expecting visitors and the museum tends to give me the pieces they don’t need anymore. They know I have rather gothic tastes.”

Arkin nods some and goes to sit on the couch. Once he gets past the initial shock, he notices it’s actually a pretty well decorated place. Strange, yes. But still aesthetically pleasing. “It’s alright. You just probably should’ve warned me about this before we got here.”

He chuckles. “Right.” He sits on the couch next to Arkin and turns on the tv, flipping through the channels before settling on the office. He then leans some against Arkin and presses a gentle kiss to his cheek.  
“You know, I really like you.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes.”

Their lips press together, and all is right with the world


End file.
